Starting from the time when we are all just a bunch of small school going children till when we are full grown up adults we meet all kinds of different people. We even make a lot of friends along the way but with the pattern of time we learn that not everyone that claims to be our friend really is our friend. As we grow up many friends come and go but there’s this one true friend that has always been there for us right from the very beginning and either one of you could take a bullet or stand against the whole world for each other. That person is someone who has earned the right to be called our best friend, now some of us have a best friend of the same gender as us but most of the times they are of the opposite gender and usually they are the ones that prove to be better, more understanding and amazing friends. Imagine one day you find out that you have feelings for them and soon after that you realise you’re in love with your best friend. You keep your mouth shut since you don’t want to ruin your friendship.
Now this person who we call our best friend is the only person who has always been loyal to us and who we could depend on for anything. After all the years everything between you guys has been going pretty smoothly but then out of the blue there comes a day when they come up running to you and you could almost tell what they are going to say by the amount of excitement on their face. You’ve been feeling weird lately and even though you know they probably have some good news to share with you but you also have this unknown fear of something that you have not figured out yet. Your friend hugs you in excitement and like you expected they have some good news for you which for some odd reason you don’t have a good vibe about. Still you try your best to stay calm and listen to what they have to say and suddenly they tell you that they have found someone nice and have a date with them this weekend. You think that’s not a big deal and someday it was meant to happen and you tell them you’re happy for them even though it’s the opposite of that going on inside you. You take some time alone to think whatever that’s going on with you and what’s wrong all of a sudden. You think it must be something temporary like a phase of jealousy so you decide to give it some time but then you realise that you still feel exactly the same even after several days have passed . In that money you start thinking if you’re in love with your best friend and after alot of thinking you start accepting the fact that you really are in love with them and trust me guys if you are going through this it’s not something unusual infact it’s very common and happens alot .
What to do after confirming what you feel for them is real?
Now that you have made sure what you feel for them is real the first thing I suggest you should do is decide whether you should tell them everything that’s going on inside you or not? I personally think that if they are your best friend they would understand your feelings no matter how they feel ATM. Instead of being harsh on you they would explain their feelings to you very politely because we are all human beings and it’s not unusual or a very big deal if you fall for your best friend I mean who else would anyone want to be in love with other than someone who has always been there for you and also understands you better than anyone else
Let’s suppose if you tell them everything and be straight forward and honest with them what’s the best and the worst that could happen ? Well let me explain that to you starting with the first one which is also the best case scenario in this case
1) Best case scenario they also feel the same for you and you guys start dating and live happily ever after.
2) Second case scenario your best friend feels nothing like you do , gets confused in the heat of the moment which probably leads to you guys parting ways and a beautiful friendship coming to it’s end.
3) Third and last case scenario is they don’t feel the same way for you as you do for them . They politely listen to what you have to say but when you’re done they try to explain you that they don’t feel the same way but they also don’t want your friendship to end but after all that being back to normal gets kind of awkward.
After you’re done sharing your feelings with them next you should wait for their response or say on the matter. If they feel they way you do then I wish you a happy life together but what if they don’t feel the same way about you it’s simple you back off. What if they don’t feel the same way but still want to be friends well if that happens to me I would simply reject that offer because if I don’t it will be very harmful for my emotional well-being . I know you might think I’m being selfish but sometimes we all need to be like that for the sake of our own well crying. Also it would be very awkward for both of us or atleast for me and that way it would also be almost impossible for me to get them off my mind . If you keep on being friends and seeing each other regularly after knowing that they are not at all interested you would just be making things more difficult and complicated specially for your self. Trust me being friends and seeing someone you love make out with someone else is the worse feeling ever. So it’s better to go your own seperate ways and I’m sure they would understand where you’re coming from and would give you the space you need and deserve in order to get over that phase. I know it’s never easy but trust me it will pass . You just need to keep distance with them no matter what and ignore all the places where there is even the slightest chance of you crossing ways with them. Well this was everything I had to say on this matter and I hope it helps those of you going through this phase and for those of you who are not well it’s always good to be prepared for situations like these before hand because it’s not unusual that someday you find yourself in exactly the same situation. I wish you guys all the best for your future. Make the most out of it as long as you are here after all we all only live once.
Written by : Ahmed Shah